Beautiful Dream.

Geez Louise. Where the hell have I been?!

Living my life to the fullest.

Oh, the poet in me... my talk of low days and sullen nights... fuck all that noise. Michelle is just fine. And you all can rest well now knowing that :)

Since my last entry, I've stayed true to my word. I've moved to a new locale and have started anew. New friends, new job, new home, new fuck-ups, NEW LIFE. Ever since I was a child, I've always dreamed of a home near a beach, and now I have that. Fulfillment of goals always feels so sweet... and we need to cherish all victories.

My chosen career path was to be an American Sign Language Interpreter, but the program has been cut by the school (can't complain too much I guess; it's all just part of a bigger issue) Meh. I will use my signing ability somehow. Video will be posted on my YouTube acct so all can see how far I've come in just a few months. The Deaf community has been quite welcoming.

Anyway...

Though me starting off the morning with a Fat Tire likely lead to this random entry, I actually have shit to do today. Some other time, loves.

Be well.

M.

Redemption Song.

Hi again.

Yeah, yeah, I know. I've been talking this same ol' bullshit for months now, but a lot has changed in my life.

Have you ever been beaten down? So low that there was no foreseeable end? Been there, lived through it. Just when you think you see the light at the end of the tunnel, you find out it's really just a freight train gunning right for you. I was lower than dirt, mon amies. And what pulled me through was the thought that, now, there's no where left to go but up :)

Lemon juice to lemonade. Yeah, there's that trademark optimism. There's what I'm known for.

You see, as an entertainer, a social butterfly, you're not supposed to have real problems. You're supposed to listen to everyone else's and keep the wine flowing. You're supposed to keep the jokes coming and the police at bay.

In my time of need the one that was there the most was a guy I'd met 3 weeks prior. He just wanted to hit the skins, but you can't blame him I guess. I am pretty hot, and I've never known vulnerability to turn a man off.

Box on top of box on top of box.

My life is shelved about 8 feet high by 6 feet wide in the center of my living room (well, off-center. TV's still set up) I've been living like this for over a month now, trying to figure out where I'm going to go.

My plan, dearests, simply involved the flip of a coin.
I gave a friend the chance to seal my fate: a nickel. Heads I stay stateside, tails I hightail it overseas. It was heads.

Secretly I was grateful for this; my main fear about going overseas was not being able to come back. All that aside, I've finally chosen my home. If all goes according to plan, I should be there within 7 months (provided I survive the next round of layoffs. Been cutting back where I can, but Chipotle is just too good)

What's more, I'm going back to school :)

Took damn near a decade, but I finally figured out what I want to do. Met with a counselor this afternoon to determine course requirements. I'm giving this 100% because what I'm going for will require nothing less, and as a show of dedication (to myself), after 4 years, I've closed down all of my web stores. Leftover stock in my possession is either being sold locally or given away. I have no more time for that hustle.

I have a new sense of purpose, loves. A renewed sense of being.

... and it's all falling into place. Wish me well.

M.

I am the Sea.

Finals are over. Thank G-d. I don't ask for much, just a passing grade. Skating by seems to be the way of this generation; I advise you all to grease up your wheels (or blades depending on your perspective)

I picked up my graduation application yesterday. Still running uphill. Wish me luck.

In other news, I got in a fight with my DVD player... and it won.

To my credit though, it wasn't an easy victory.

It ate a Chris Rock DVD that I was looking forward to. With so much on my plate, I've been renting comedies by the bucketload. Laughing just makes you feel so much better, doesn't it? I've made it a personal goal to laugh at least 5 minutes a day, everyday, for the past week. It's done wonders.

Blu-Ray: +1 Michelle: +0

Determined, I went in my tool bag and grabbed my screwdriver (the anarchist in me wanted to grab the hammer, but I realized that would be counterproductive) and tore  the system wide open. I'm surprised none of the cables snapped because I wasn't particularly gentle. See that gray unit on the right? Yeah, I broke that open too. After much pulling I got the disc out (albeit with a chip on the edge. Was ultimately only able to watch about 50 minutes of it. SUCK), then worked on reassembling the thing piece by piece. Miraculously, I did well. I made a unique color coding system (i.e. - using my paint tubes as totems) so I knew which screws went where, and after a few minutes the system was as good as new. 

Well, kind of.

You see everything went well, but there was one major problem once all was said and done: the disc tray wouldn't close. Apparently something got behind the door trigger while I was (wo)manhandling the thing. It was only about 2 months old anyway; most electronics have a 90 day warranty. I've already made up some bullsh*t and exchanged it. I'm back in business. A smile and little cleavage will get you out of almost anything :)

In regard to the DVD, it's not as if it were mine anyway. Quite frankly, it's the DVD's own fault for getting stuck. Let it be the next renter's problem.

Still packing and finding relics of a life long ago lived:

*An original Simon game from the late 80s (I was a pro at that game. Got it for my 2nd Xmas. Played it until at least age 8. To this day, I still believe that game is why I have pretty good memory retention)

* An Ewok plushie, original CareBear, and that cat from Strawberry Shortcake

* Optimus Prime, Hot Wheels cars, a suction cup gun, Astroboy figurine

* A Magic 8 Ball (with half the blue stuff leaked out. Wanted to chuck it at my neighbor's bratty children, but I don't think I need a criminal record)

* Inuyasha DVDs, Gremlins

* A jug of rice wine a friend brought back from China years ago (I'm afraid to open it)

Save about 5 items, all of it went to the Salvation Army. Don't know what I plan to do with the booze. I'm too malicious to simply pour it down the sink. Ideas?

I'm about to hit the streets again so I'll end it here.

D: Here's the vid from that night @ Bugsy's. Awesome show BTW. Sugar's rendition of MJ's "Human Nature"

My friends Deej (on mic) Jesse & Shawn (both on percussion), Charlotte (female lead) and some random dude on the sax.

And who was that dude Crip walking in the back?

Love it when random people go on stage.

Peace out.

<3 M

My Spine.

"All men seek happiness. This is without exception. Whatever different means they employ, they all tend to this end. The cause of some going to war, and of others avoiding it, is the same desire in both, attended with different views. The will never takes the least step but to this object. This is the motive of every action of man, even those who hang themselves" - Blaise Pascal

Yep, the binomial coefficient guy (surely you have just as fond a memory of geometry as I do). Somehow philosophy is easier to understand from a mathematician. (***Ed. note: Now that I've actually read one of his books in its entiriety, I won't advertise it here. I was disgusted. I like the quote above though, so I'll leave it - M. 07/28/10)


Full entry to come soon.

It's finals week and I've been slammed. I'm packing, selling, shipping, giving away, painting, gluing, origami-ing... trying to make it through the day, just like you guys. Send me your well wishes and I will do the same for you :)

Bring me all of your dreams,
You dreamer,
Bring me all your
Heart melodies
That I may wrap them
In a blue cloud-cloth
Away from the too-rough fingers
Of the world.

<3 M

Kansai Airport in Osaka. On my way home...

  

Short Circuit.

So yeah, it's been about three weeks since my last login.

A lot's happened, amigos. School started, met someone, cleaned out my closet for monthly Salvation Army drop off... I might have lied to you before, but I'm ready to admit now that I'm not made of steel.

I need to move out of my condo too because my mortgage company has been hounding me to refinance. I did it about 4 years ago and have been skating by paying pennies since (got in before this horrible economic downtown) Anyway, my loan is due to reset next year so my mortgage will double unless I move out. I've been toying with moving in the last few months, but now I need to get the ball rolling.

I never thought this would come out of my mouth, but I think I'm scared of change. Or maybe more I don't want to make my life any more difficult, so I've been acceptant of the status quo. This is the year I finally do it. I've been talking so much bull about leaving here, but this is the year it'll actually happen. I can feel it. I need to remind myself not to be scared of change, but to embrace it. Easier said than done.

Uploaded some more videos from my Japan trip; still not done. This vid is from the top of the Floating Garden building in Osaka. I was there on my last day, just a few hours before heading to Kansai to come home.



I think I can find those chairs at Ikea. I hope so anyway.

Here's a shot of the outside of the building. Took a little over 10 minutes to get to the top.

Made some new Hello Kitty listings. I got this one at the site of the Great Buddha in Nara (see below). This one I think I'll keep. I'm not much of a Hello Kitty fan, but I couldn't think of a price point I'd be comfortable selling at... not to mention I find it ironic and mildly blasphemous :)

Gotta get back to school work. I have to go to a testing lab tomorrow because my Biology teacher is a Julian-calendar-using-I'll-give-you-3-days-to-do-a-16-page-lab-and-I-don't-care-if-you-work-10-hour-days-you-have-6-tests-a-week sadist.

M <3

Kenroku-En Garden, Takoyaki, Rainstorms

Uploaded some new vids today. These are from Kanazawa in Kenroku-En ("Six Attributes"), one of Japan's 3 great gardens. Click here if you want more info.

It was raining pretty badly out, but it was so humid! I had on 2 shirts and a jacket that day; I was sweating like a pig. The whole place was surreal. I felt more like I was in Middle Earth than a place that actually exists in this world.

There were a lot of tourists there despite the weather. I stayed in the background and listened to them speak to each other to find out if they were Chinese, Korean, Thai, etcetera. I breathed a little sigh of relief if I understood them. The little Japanese I do know helped me out quite a bit. 

Everyone I encountered was very nice; smiles are universal :)

I made something like 30 videos during my trip so you'll have to forgive me if they're out of order or vague. I'll try to describe as much as I can remember.

Before I go, I have to mention this little tidbit because it was one of my "geek out" moments. When we came to a truck stop somewhere on our way to Kyoto, I shrieked a little when I found a takoyaki stand. 

Tada! :))

I love octopus and wanted to try it... and I won't even lie. It was only because there was a whole Ranma 1/2 episode about it (I believe in season 4) and I have yet to find it back home :-P

It was pretty good. The sauce was like A-1 or some type of barbeque sauce. I ate it for dinner whenever I found a stand if only to feel closer...

It's a really funny show if you've never seen it.

You should check it out sometime. I'm sure you can rent it from a local library.

Anway, back to the grind. Made some new listings for you Hello Kitty fans out there :)

Late,

M.

In Kanazawa. Forgot What Day It Is.

This photo was taken in Shirakawa; high (like, WAY high) in the Japanese alps...

I've been in the Japanese alps for the past few days; this is the first time I've had internet access since we left Tokyo. Just uploaded a few more videos to my YouTube account. Check 'em out :)))











This is just a taste. See my YouTube account for more...

Later,

M :)))